I am too

I am too old to wear miniskirts.

I am too young to have grey hairs. (Stop laughing.)

I am too old to go to live shows at clubs.

I am too young to have a child.

I am too old to have a 5-year-old.

I am too young to be a director of anything.

I am too old to feel like I'm still figuring things out.

I am too young to be this old.

Sometimes all of these things are true anyway.